/// omen
whats.in.my.syringe
grew up falling
apart
confused and stuck
in a group she was
a leader for the deaf and dumb
at age six, a leader for the
outcasts and dumb.
grew up perplexed
witnessed the devil with an axe
standing by the door she cried
hoping it was a dream
still hoping it was a dream.
kept on growing up
mixed up
started learning how to smile
started cheating at age seven
in a test yes
starting cheating at age seven
hiding under the wings of a messiah
her sister
everyone knew her because
she hid under the wings of her messiah.
sometimes they
wanted to be-friend her
later they
started shouting and ignoring her
o how she felt so alone
how she felt so alone
till age ten... it went on and on
confused and dazed
"am i accepted already? they seem so nice to me?"
next day they just never spoke to her
left her dry and
wondering why....
witnessed the devil
up on her ceiling
smiling down to her when she tried sleeping
dangling up above her bed
devil spoke to her and said,
"little girl have no fear,
i am real, yes so real,
as real as you...,
a creature so young yet so much to feel,
little girl... i am the one,
the one who will help you,
i will be the one to cast this all away,
if you stop crying yes i will,
be the one to cast this all away."
fell asleep and forgot about it by day.
jumped over fences
during school hours
not even 13 and yes jumping fences during school hours
fly by herself, just fly
to the shopping malls yes
so alone
yet so alive.
witnessed the devil
above her ceiling
talking to her while she tried screaming
"LEAVE ME ALONE, I WANT TO SLEEP!"
nobody gave a fuck
nobody gave a fuck
tried telling somebody and yeah
NOBODY gives a FUCK.
eight years old only
eight years old
she drew portraits of women
only eight years old
at sixteen she drew lovely pictures
painted beautiful landscapes
all taken away by the stupid school
put up in their stupid hall of fame
dont have shit to keep
all gone and dead now like dead sheep.
drew a cross-shaped
dagger
stabbed in a man's chest
Guru Besar said
this is blasphemy at its best
"i am not going to punish you,
but you have to stop,
this is not the first aisha,
this is not the first,
this is the most beautiful painting aisha
but the school wont allow this on the walls"
"who said i wanted
my paintings on your walls?"
"i am not your prisoner i do as i please
i come to school to learn and all i get are these,
my work taken away and left sour like cheese.
you claim yourself the people of the good believing
devil works his ways, it is you who he sleeps in"
blasphemy!
and adored by many
rumours
like superstar
spreaded rumours of her like a
superstar
"my child you have made your name,
now everybody wants to be in your fame,
you can try and ignore me
but inside you, you are already with me"
LEAVE ME ALONE I WANT TO SLEEP!!!
he never came back.
nobody gave a fuck
nobody gave a fuck
nobody gives a fuck!
now she has a
problem with sleeping
shuts her eyes and all she remembers is the ceiling
if you come back, demon, if you do
tell me, am i the daughter of Heaven or of Doom
i seem to swing both ways at very best
pray to God all day and
become an asshole like the rest
demon you were a friend and an enemy
my enemy of eternity
"keep your friends close but keep your enemies
closer...." said a voice in whisper
seven demons came into dream and tore her
four side ways apart
north south east and west
planted a syringe in her chest
"dont speak, child, never speak
God is watching you, dont speak
by the time you wake up you dont
have to question yourself just dont////"
wings so big it was
all white
"demon" i dont know if they were
devil of night
or angels from light
it was fasting month i
cant remember what but it was
fasting month
nobody gives a fuck
nobody gives a fuck
guilty like the government
i am here alone in this torment
nobody gives a fuck
i will leave this story
alone to die with me
alone i will be buried
God take me home
hug me in Your glory
kiss me Your victory
take me to your eden
God i have long struggled this demon
myself! myself! myself!
screaming words like a heathen
i had these headaches that i scream
my boyfriend was so afraid
i have these headaches that i scream
he sang me a song till i slept and dream.
take me away.
God take me away.
whats in my syringe,
God
what is it?
"only when you wake up, child,
only when you wake up,
in His land
of the free."
.